Wednesday, December 29, 2010

the inner life.

i found a web page in chinese. pastor grace (江秀琴牧师)teach about the inner life. a life that a christian should have.

God blow into us his behavior. His behavior of desiring to love and be love.

I am so thirsty inside me. the desire of wanting something to be filled in me. anything that i do in my mind not my heart. with my mind, its like dragging my heavy body. Why?

I wonder. i watch movie. i sleep. i serve. but still....

why? what's missing?

there is only one answer. God's love.

i desire his love but my mind is too stubborn. i want to stay in him more, but my mind is looking, finding from the world.

STUBBORN mind!

now, i m tired. tired and need rest.
fluffy bed and red wine?

nope. Rest in the Lord's presence. Go and find him for love. He is my only satisfaction. Only him can bring me to a spacious place, lying on green grass beside the flowing water.
Only Him and no other.

He's the God with fire of love surround him.

Monday, November 22, 2010

the music industry

Beaware of what you are hearing friends, be aware.

this is from Jeason's blog.

read it.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

The road not taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth.

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same.

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost. 1915.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

be still

转一转, 转一转, 还是觉得我需要神成为我的锚,使我稳住。

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Singapore

Everybody, Lydia now at Singapore.

There is something i need to confess. When there is no need, i really won't shop. Usually people say that women love to shop, I do agree. I ll also do that, but i m more too window shopping. Look around and see what are the new things around. Just for that. Unless, I do need some cloths.

I m still a girl, likes pretty cloths, likes to see fashion magazine, likes accessories too. I just don't buy them yet.. just hold my horses first. ^^

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

my sister





haha... this I must remember before i forgot.
Just now my sister called at 12.45pm. she ask that if i can go pick her up at school.. So, i say to her. i don wan to.. cause need to change and then go down.. She say she s hungry and will reach home only after 2pm.. I ask there is no school bus today? she say she don know cause didnt saw anybody that use the same bus with her. maybe they all go back already. i said, so you wan to waste the school bus fee to pick you up? then she said, okokok, forget about it.. byebyebyebye..
then she just hung up. i haven even finish my conversation.

So this is something i know about my sister.

she is impatient when it comes to waiting. she like fast pace. she won't really ask one thing lots of times unless she really wan it. don really like to be alone. can't stand of being hungry. when she is good, she will treat ppl nice. when she is angry, she ll blow anything no matter who you are.

she is a good friend among friends and family. what she hate, she like, you ll know it from her face. she sometimes she talks rough but she dont really mean it. its her style (some sort of way). she likes to share anything happen to her, about her family, about her friends, about what she like. a good chatter. got lots of different opinion on different things.

but now she is still not talking with my cousin, Janice. its been almost a year already. pray for both of them. two

this is what i know in year 2010. do you also know her? she s funny when she know her. but at first not really easy to get close. hahha...

P.S. : Actually today my car is in the clinic, so i cant take it out. but really like to say something other than the truth to see her reaction. haha... sometimes, because of this naughtiness, i end up having misunderstandings. haha...

really love my sister. muaks muaks muaks. XD

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Shopping..




today went to skin food to but some emulsion. then the sales girl gave us some samples on other products. haha.. can try try la..


we tried lots of color before we bought any. So the finals are below.


this is all the thing me and my sis got.

Skin food : Cucumber & Lettuce Emulsion, Ph balance Nail Vita, Nut Essence Nail Vita, marine Color Nail Vita; sample pack - Sweet Chocolate foam, Honey Black Tea Jelly Foam, Rice Mask Wash off, Black Sugar Mask Wash Off, Potiron au Lait Cream.

























money out flow got to stop already..
These 2 things down here I bought it at 18th May. hehhe..
130 Projects to get you into Film Making and a Mentholatum Lip Balm

these days go out = credit loss. XD

Friday, May 14, 2010

clean up

Today's Japanese class went well. =) althought still got some of it I don't understand yet. hheehe..

this afternoon I went to aunt's house to take away bibi's lunch back ,since she's been asking it everytime she comes home. I leave it at the computer table upstairs.

A sunny day today. I put the bedsheets from the guest room to wash. Grandma is going to stay from tonight. while waiting for the bedsheets and pillow cases, I put the blanket under the sun and the comforter after that.

*dididi..* the bedsheets are ready. Under the bright warm sun, you can see the clear blue sky with little white clouds fooling around. I line the bedsheets at the tip of the front gate.

bibi is not back yet.

I went upstairs finishing my Japanese drama. 'Operation Love, episod 5'.

Its 2.50pm. I recall my own plan of clean up the house. I hesitate. A bit lazy actually. hehhe.. but, I ve nothing else to do. ( not really nothing, but really like nothing to do since the sem break starts. )

So i started sweeping, moping.

Its 4.00 pm. Mum called. She said, " You haven't go over (to aunt's house)?" "e.. not yet." "you need to make egg tarts for my friend. I told you yesterday already." "did you?... oO... ok. bye."

I was halfway wiping the floor. Oh o!! I need to be fast.

4.23pm. Finish wiping the floor. clean up the toilet. put the floor cloth to dry. Ready for shower.

Bibi is not back yet... She follow my father home?? I don know.

finish shower. finally can go over to make egg tart. looking at the container with porridge from aunt's. I bring it over with me again.

met uncle and siew siew at the living room. Asked for the tart base. She s still busy with the last Chicken pie. So I went back to the kitchen to finish up the porridge. Haiz.. She didn't come back until 8.30pm

When my family come back, no one said anything about the floor os something. Is it not clean enough to be obvious? Maybe. =p or it is what i should do ? hhehe.. sometime human need to be encouraged and get a little attention. that's human.

but then don't yearn for men's praises, but let God's glory be shown through you.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Japanese

I'm going to start to learn Japanese.

Day 1 introduction
learn like the japanese way. hehhe..

i use this web site as a guide.

Day 2 - Day 8 Hiragana

加油啦!! p(>.<)q

Long way ahead

What is it you want, Lydia? Is your heart confuse of something?

to wait for the Lord's presence for a whole day... or to watch a bunch of movie and end up asking yourself 'why did i do that'?

I m now back to the time, the gap where it's empty and you can do whatever you want. forget about what i ve chose before. But what do i want to do now?

Regret, repent, renounce, recover, renew. i know.

but when are you going to start to be obedience?
when are you going to start what you want to finish and finish what you start?

One by one, each must be done.
the trail will be watched by an angel sent.
little Lydia walking down the isle.
looking for the way to leading God.

today i watched a movie, actually 2 movie, from the same actor. 2 director, 2 stlye, 2 love story.


ハルフウェイ( Halfway )


僕の初恋をキミに捧ぐ ( I give my first love to you )
导演: 新城毅彦

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

fun

hahha.. ha~ i just had fun with God. i asked a question. can i go to Singapore with my Grandmother at the 22nd of may.

I prayed for a sign. i said if the phone rang on 9.00 pm, no matter who called, then i ll go. i waited for almost an hour.

the clock at my mac stated 9.02pm.

The phone didn't rang. i was just... okay, lord. i got you. hahahha... its been awhole since i play games with my father up heaven.. hahahh.... Actually, before this i prayed that if the tickets are both less than RM 100, then i ll go. Apparently, its almost RM 200. so i gave up. haahh.. this time i confirm again. Naughty and almost rebellious. hahah..

okay, lord. Got your message. What s next?

Thursday, May 6, 2010

518.com

I checked. its a blank page with a clock ticking at the lower right corner.

what is it?

beware of time?

Maybe.

Monday, April 26, 2010

sign?

what does 518.com mean..., my Lord? what is it?

Monday, February 22, 2010

坏习惯

我可以一直持守下去

但后来 败了


每次都一样


曾经想要持续的有很多

但偏偏 我不能 守住


当遇到困难 拦阻 压力


一直想逃避 想不理

但存在的 还是存在着


它不会突然间消失 不会突然间解决了


现在能做的 就是 在原点再爬起来


在我不能 在神凡是都能

Friday, February 5, 2010

God's way

God's way of letting you move is really speechless.

Days before I got this calling to send someone home from the bus stop. but I ignored it. My heart will tell me good, you should go ahead and approach; my mind tell me its too busybody.

So last night, I waited for my friend, Jiayi, at CAIS (UNIMAS library) to finish her discussion with Meimei on BM project. I met her at 8.30pm after fail searching for ethernet plugs with a power outlet nearby. (there is just too man poeple there last night, so i gave up)

they are half way to finish, so Jiayi ask me to find some Directing book with simple English for her. I wondered around at level 2 and 1 to find the book. Found a directing, a directors interview, a meaning of signs in cinema and a colour book. heheh. interesting books... hope can finish somehow. XD I went back and they and still discussing. I sat and a nearby table to read the books i borrowed, but I slept on the table. woke up couple of times, not finish. I went to surf at the lower floor.

when we prepare to leave CAIS, its already 11.06pm. We reach the car and someone from the bus stop approach us. The ask for the bus's arrival. Unfortunately, they miss the time. She with her friend is from the East Campus which is a 5 minute drive from the west campus.. It ll be a long way to walk in the late night.

So i drop them at their college. Its a dark drive when you almost reach there cause the boy's college beside it is now empty. So there is no light there. Dark.

On the way back, i thought of this event. I think that God is really doing in his ways to let you follow His ways.

Amazing about last night. It felt like you are spreading the love in your neighborhood. I love it. I love God.

I often prayed and ask how can I show God s love. So... That is IT. That is LOVE!

For God so loved the world that He gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in Him shall not be perish but have eternal life. John 3:16


Wednesday, February 3, 2010

filmmaker

being a producer is not easy as i thought it is. Its not just being the boss but also the mother of all crew, the counselor, the friend for each. still in the process of learning here.
being reminded to have a strong intention and motive on finishing our group's short film, its a start for me. my attitude before is the nothing-is-too-important kind. and this let me to become careless, irresponsible, and ignorant. and mostly lazy and sometime arrogant.

Now I m a cinematography student. I think that this path is laid out by GOD, prepared with His own hands.
I didn't choose this program myself, its chosen by my cousin. Thank you to her that i had lots fun till now.
I can't.. can't... Ahhh!! Its not easy.. but.. but... I want to change!! I want!! I WANT!!


Its time to change! to really change!! my self discipline, my faithfulness on one thing and the commitment.

All need to be awaken. I remembered how i prayed to god about this issue but.. no action really last long for me.

this time because of being a servant of God for love, a producer and a student to work with assingment dues.

I GOT TO CHANGE!!

to be a new born, you learn from the start
to be a new self, you change your attitude
to be a new student, you discipline your self
to be a new servant, you humble down your ego
to be a new daughter, you regain the faithfulness.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

下一站 幸福


tell you guys! this drama have this most crying scene i ve i ever seen. Almost every episode you ll see someone cry. no matter its the main or sub character. Wow! and i mean its not very easy to deal with cry scenes for me.

I m impressed with the directer of this drama. Its a SHE. hahahh~ seldom i saw a female standing on the biggest position among all. i like her style in directing. i can learn from her. =)



陈慧翎 导演

Thursday, January 21, 2010

still same

i m still the same in terms of doing assignment. LAST MINUTE JOB. hate it so much but never really do anything do improve it yet. jia you la..

once is enough as a reminder. better don't go twice.

Lydia, 醒醒吧!现在不是时候给你懒惰呗!

Monday, January 18, 2010

skin food



this afternoon went to Hills for Skin Food with bibi. ^^ Skin Food in Kuching is finally open. I bought a cleansing foam and a box of cotton and 2 more stamps. hahah.. I bought the box of cotton pads so that i can have another stamp.=P

the blue cherry is from kuching! Yeah~!!

Oh ya.. i cut my hair and i bought some gadgets for my MIDO. a mouse, a headset and an ethernet cable. heheh...


Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Clint Eastwood

i want to find something about directing techs for my assignment and i saw this. =)

i found this as a new knowledge on directing skills.

to be honest, i haven really get rid of my last-minute attitude. hahha... i like the feeling of knowing more about something, but just too stubborn to look for it. Xp jia you jia you lo~


Clint Eastwood Directing Techniques - Directing Actor

What do Gene Hackman, Sean Penn, Tim Robbins, Morgan Freeman and Hilary Swank all have in common?

They all won Academy Awards under the direction of Clint Eastwood. So how does he do it? How does Clint Eastwood manage to get great performances from all his actors? It helps that Eastwood himself is an actor and, as such, understands the acting process.

But more importantly, Eastwood knows that the key to directing actors to great performances is creating a set environment where the actor feels safe. An actor is more likely to be uninhibited and take risks when they are relaxed and feel safe. Clint Eastwood uses a variety of techniques to create and maintain a safe environment in which his actors can work. The Moose will go through several of these techniques.

When directing actors, the most important thing that you can do as a director is to trust your actors. Don’t be a dictatorial puppet master. Allow them to have input into their performances and come up with ideas of their own. This will allow them the freedom to try something different and bold instead of playing it safe.

Clint Eastwood often casts his actors off of tape. He watches actors performances in other movies and television shows to get a feeling of what they can do. Then when the actors arrive on set, he allows them to show him what they want to do in a scene. Eastwood may give them an adjustment, but, for the most part, he trusts his actors. He knows what they are capable of from their past performances and thus trusts his actors to do their preparation and homework.

The reason why this works for Eastwood is that he has a reputation for doing very few takes. The actors know that Eastwood will only shoot two or three takes the majority of the time and often prints and uses the first take in his movies. If you make a mistake, it will probably end up in the movie. In the hands of a lesser director, shooting in this manner will likely end up in disaster like an Ed Wood movie, but it works for Clint Eastwood because of the trust that he gives his actors. The actors know that Clint trusts them as well as how he shoots and as a result, they show up on set knowing their material and ready to go from the onset

Another technique that Clint Eastwood uses to create a comfortable set is his refusal to use the standard “Action!” and “Cut!” cues. Instead, Eastwood just rolls the cameras and lets the actors start the scene whenever they’re ready. Then he will just signal for the camera to cut. Or, if he is in a talking sort of mood, he sometimes will say “that’s enough of that shit” or something like that.

The reason Eastwood eschews from the traditional “Action!” and “Cut!” cues is that those commands, usually shouted out so that everyone on the set can hear, can be disruptive to an actor’s concentration. They create an atmosphere that is a little more formal and a little less natural. If an actor is in his pre-scene, an “Action!” can be intrusive and take them out of the moment. Likewise, someone yelling “Cut!” can be a little jarring to an actor focused in the moment and make it harder for them to slip back into the scene for another take.

So how does the set know when the cameras are rolling then? This leads to another technique that Clint Eastwood uses to create a comfortable and safe environment for his actors. On a typical set, only certain key people will have radios and earpieces. On an Eastwood set, almost everyone has an earpiece. This allows Eastwood and his crew to communicate with each other in a quiet manner that is not disruptive to the actors.

In addition, this technique helps elicit better reactions and performances from a crowd scene or a scene with extras because the extras and supporting players never know when the cameras are rolling. They are forced to stay quiet and in their characters because they do not want to be yelled at for ruining a take. This is an excellent production technique and can be used at all levels of filmmaking.

Monday, January 11, 2010

365 days of love

i saw pastor Jaeson ma's face book earlier this morning and know that he is having something going on. he called this year of his '365 days of love' and i think its wonderful. hhaha

we should pass on the love that God gave us.
sharing. caring. giving. loving.

sweet sweet love of HIS.

Then how about me?



yesterday, me and sis went to Crown Square with meijie and tracy.
i got myself 4 all different dresses. Gorgeous.. *weewit* XD had fun till 11pm ( my mom ring my phone from 10pm till 11pm.. worry, eih? )

hope can upload those pic. hehe..

Saturday, January 9, 2010

神之水滴

recently, i ve not watch enough movie.. and read enough books. haha.. that day went to see my mentor ( Mdm Candida) to take my result and she said that ' Lydia.. why is the course beside you re own program doesn't score well? ' ( she said something like that.. one can't remember much, can she.. ) " i don't know... (usual answer XD) Maybe i m not interested. hehe.."
later, she talk about other things.. and said that i need to use much imagination in making film/story. she said that a diretor named Francis Ford Coppola once said,

you can be/do anything in film, but if you don't have IMAGINATION, then you've got nothing.

So, imagination IS important. Yet, "you still need the knowledge of film." she said.
"you got to change your mode back to gain knowledge, Lydia. Read as much as you can"

hahha~ I will certainly try my best. =P

now i m reading.. ' The Eye is Quicker' from Richard D. Pepperman. tell you more when i finish it. =^.^=

one more thing~ i m just start watching a drama series from Japan called ‘神の雫 Kami no Shizuku’. Its about wine. Interesting. me intro you see.. =P